Letting Go and Being Thankful

Good morning! I just want to start off today by thanking Quaker's Oatmeal for making a delicious, filling breakfast of only 2 weight watchers points per pack! It was the most satisfying breakfast so far! Today I'm trying to do the "Less is More" approach. Eating smaller meals through out the day so that I'm not ravenous by dinnertime...like yesterday.

I tell ya, I have never felt more encouraged and free then I do right now. The first part of that was being open...the second part of that is letting go. I've been thinking and praying alot last night about forgiveness. I've never really held on to anger or hurt, but just in case a little remains, I've decided to forgive and forget all the hurtful arrows I've targeted over my lifetime as a result of my size. So....not that any of you who really hurt me will ever read this...or maybe you are reading it and you never said anything to my face but have behind my back....I just want you to know, "I forgive you." You may not have, or may never know the power of words and how they can be used to tear down. I know there were many a day I kept saying to myself, "sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" or "I'm the rubber you're the glue what bounces off of me sticks to you." But the truth is....words do hurt...incredibly. Even as adults we have the capability to tear down with our words...to our friends, spouse, children, co-workers. I challenge everyone to consider the power of your words today.

BUT....words also have the power to breathe life. I have been blessed to receive the breaths of life from many people over my lifetime. To name them all would be ridiculous...but suffice it to say..if you can call me your friend...you are one of those people. The other thing I have been thinking about is how sometimes ACTIONS speak louder than words.

It's no secret that I was boy crazy growing up. While we are in the honesty kick, let me just admit that many of my jr. high and high school friends have a joke about..."Did you ever get a letter from Morgan?" There are days when I want to slap each and every one of these people that never let it die....but the reality is...I did write some letters....alot of letters..Ha!. And they were all written from an encouraging stand point, but with a glimmer of hope that one of them MIGHT like me. I can look back now and see I was looking for validation, for acceptance. All the other girls had boyfriends, I didn't have mine til my Jr. or Sr. year of high school. (Thank you T.F. for looking past what you saw and finally making that dream of being accepted happen...and congrats on your engagement! You deserve the best my friend!)

But it hit me this morning..........almost every single one of those guys ended up being a date of mine to a high school dance. Being in youth ministry and looking at high school students now....I can think of a handful of young men who would sacrifice their reputation to be the date of the largest girl in the school to a high school dance. And ya know what? I had ALOT of fun at them. And those guys are still my friends to this day. So let me get sappy for a moment and personally thank: Donald, Jason, John, Richie, Chad, David, Kevin, Shane, & Tommy. (If I'm leaving anyone out, I truly apologize.)   You are all stand up guys. I will forever be so thankful for the role you have played in my life. I hear countless stories of overweight women who say...they never went to a dance or had a date or any of that...and I'm so thankful...that I can say...I went to every single one..and had a blast.

And lastly, I have to forgive myself. There are so many days that I think back and have some regret about "never being able to know what it was like to do this or that." and frankly, I have to forgive myself for not believing in myself back then. Only I held what was necessary for me to make a change. No amount of letters, or dances, or anything else could really give me what I needed. I looked to everyone else to tell me who I was....and no matter how much of a Bible Thumper I was back in those days....I never sought my validation in Christ.

I can honestly say I never used my weight as and EXCUSE for anything. I danced in the show choir, I ran for student body president. I held an office in more school clubs than you can count. And I do believe I owe that in large part to my parents and to my youth minister Marty. They always told me I could do anything, and always supported me. And that's the song I sing to everyone I meet now....

YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU SET YOUR MIND TO.

So....where are you on your journey? We're all on one..it doesn't have to be weight loss. Maybe you are on a journey of forgiveness of yourself or someone else. Maybe you're trying to find hope. Maybe your on a journey in a struggling relationship or marriage.  Maybe it's a spiritual journey. Whatever that journey may be, I'm here to tell you that your words are powerful.....to others and TO YOURSELF. I truly believe that one of the BIGGEST weapons of the enemy are words. DO NOT believe the lies. YOU ARE WONDERFULLY MADE. YOU ARE LOVED...and as so many special people have reminded me.....YOU ARE WORTH IT.